Gefilte Fish Out of Water


Israeli Pedi
April 3, 2009, 8:27 am
Filed under: Exploits

img_1749Next I went in search of a salon that would give me a reasonably priced pedicure.  In the States, I get them in the summer months, about once a month, when it’s flip-flop and sandal weather.  Well, it’s almost that time here, so better get movin.

The first place I went to was like, “Uh-uh, Passover is coming up, and we are slammed today.”  The next place was like, “Try two doors down, our sister salon does men.”  They wanted 120 shekels ($30) – kinda expensive for a men’s pedi.  In NYC, I can get a mani-pedi for $25.  So, I looked more, asked some nice women in a perfume store, and they told me 120 shekels was a good price for this part of town (Northern Tel Aviv, or the “Old North” as it is known now that the city has been developed further north into an area of high rise condos known as Ramat Aviv), which is the ritziest neighborhood in T.A. (would I live anyplace else?  Scratch that: I just left Harlem, where I lived for 3 years…)  So, I went back to the 120 shekel place, but they told me I would have an hour wait.

So, I kept searching…went into a salon that only did hair, but the owner (Julie) referred me to a salon in an indoor shopping mall across the street and said to ask for Lilia and tell her, “Julie sent ya.”  Did all this.  Lilia was busy with a client, but Inga – a cute, early 30-ish oleh from Ukraine who has been here 9 years – was happy to give me a pedi.  Yay!

I was all set to continue reading Life with my Sister Madonna by Christopher Ciccone, but Inga wanted to talk.  Girlfriend must really live The Secret, b/c she had been sitting there studying English and wishing the salon had more English-speaking clients so she could practice when I walked in, she tells me.

So, she’s all like, “You looking for a wife?”  I’m all like, “Nope, I’m gay.”  Lilia would also ask her questions in Russian and Hebrew from across the salon, and Inga would translate them to me.  These yentas told me that Lilia’s daughter has a gay boss, who is 42 and a really nice guy.  “Is he cute?” I want to know.  They haven’t met him and can’t answer.  These broads don’t mess around, b/c I’m like (to Inga): “Who is she talking to?” (Lilia was on the phone now).  Inga’s like, “She’s on with her daughter, getting details about her gay, single boss.”  Turns out when Lilia’s client hears the boss’ name, she’s like, “Oh, I know him!  He’s such a doll!”  The client suggested she and I friend each other on Facebook, b/c the gay single boss is her FB friend.  I suggest instead that I give her the G-Fish blog URL, and he can just contact me here.

Lilia, owner of the salon

Lilia, owner of the salon

So, I’ll let ya know.

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